Some of you may be thinking that this baby blog thing is a little weird. You are wondering why I am starting this blog, why I am trying to gather so much information, and why do it via the internet. There are actually two reasons why I came up with the idea. The first is that times have changed here in the United States. Back in the “good old days” new mothers lived with or very near their own mothers, sisters, aunts, and lady cousins who helped raise and give advice about children. In this day and age families are much more spread out. I am the only person in my family that lives in my city or even my state. I don’t get to see the other females in my family very much and when I do it is often a rushed and chaotic interaction at a Christmas party or wedding. So, with the help of the modern world’s internet, I am hoping to be able to talk to the trusted ladies in my life and get a little help.
The second reason, please don’t laugh; I am terrified of having a baby! I have been around babies my whole life, babies in droves actually. But they were never mine. I could always look forward to their parents coming by to pick them up after an afternoon of chasing them around. I won’t be able to do that anymore! Also, I don’t even need to mention the effects of actually carrying and delivering a baby. I certainly have no experience there. Yikes! More than once have I dropped the laundry basket or dishtowel and ran to the TV to change the channel when the show “Baby Story” came on! I swear, it is worse than a slasher film! The most terrifying scenes I have ever seen! Maybe some of the fear and psychological scarring comes from high school when they made us watch the most horrible childbirth film in health class: all the screaming and blood (and did the woman really have to be huge, hairy, and naked?). AHHHH! I suppose the point was to educate us somewhat, but mostly to scare us I think, make us horrified of teen pregnancy. Kind of like that drunk-driving video they also showed in high school assemblies “RED PAVEMENT”. Yuck! Do you remember that? Broken glass, twisted metal, and guts everywhere. But you see, there is one big difference between the two that they didn’t think about: Driving drunk was meant to be shunned forever, but the whole pregnancy/ childbirth thing—THAT they expect us to turn around and start doing a few years later and be happy about it! Are they crazy? Also, when I hear moms around me talking about baby stuff it seems like all you ever hear about are the horror stories. I guess that is because the dramatic stories are more fun to tell, but there really aren’t helpful for any freaked-out future mothers who may be listening. This is where you guys could really help me out. I am hoping to get a different perspective and maybe a little comfort and hope about the whole thing. I am looking for honesty and truth because those are great too, but it can’t all be such a nightmare, right? RIGHT???
Well, now you know what this baby blog is all about and I hope you will find the time to participate. I would REALLY appreciate it! If you have a comment to make about any of my posts but don’t want anyone else to see it you can always email me at natphatrat@gmail.com.
Thanks!
10 comments:
Oh, Natalie!
First of all, your blog is very pretty.
Second, when it's your baby you do love it a whole lot more than other people's babies and that sure helps. Yes, sometimes you go crazy, but my goal is have a whole lot more non-crazy times than crazy ones. Plus, you are at an advantage because you have a pretty level headed husband.
Third, yes the lady in the birthing video did have to be naked. Well, at least on the bottom. But that is strange that they showed it to you in highschool.
Natalie Noodle. You are hilarious. I miss you.
Well, as I am currently very pregnant - due in 9 weeks, and have two little ones already, I will happily contribute my thoughts and opinions to you. Cute idea.
And don't worry - I have always been extremely terrified by pregnancy/childbirth, and here I am third time around. Also, if you recall, it was predicted that I would be President of the "Bad Mother's Club," and my kids are both alive and well so far.
Love ya,
Erin
@ Emily-- I hope I have more happy times than crazy ones in my future and I am glad Matt is level headed. I understand why the video lady didn't have pants on, I just thought a shirt could have been used. But, again, I think they were trying to scare us.
@ Erin-- YAY for the Bad Mothers Club! Ha Ha! It is nice to hear I am not the only one that is/was terrified of becoming a mother.
Thanks to both you old BYU roommates for participating. I am very grateful for your help!
Oh Nat . . . you crack me up. I remember when I took a pregnancy test that indicated I was prego with KK. I cried out of fear and excitement at the same time. I wish I had drama-lacking birth stories to share, but it just doesn't seem to happen that way for me. I will say that when you are in that much pain, you don't care about anything except for the pain meds. Thoughts of modesty? What's that? Poop on the delivery table? Who cares? Afraid of screaming? The louder the better!
Nat-all first time mothers feel inadequate. I remember when we brought Chandler home then Ben knew more what to do than I did. Then the motherly instincts kick in and everything was fine. You will do great. When you have a baby of your own it is so different than tending nieces or nephews, you will love it. Exhausting, but well worth it.
Tiffany
Ditto, Ditto, Ditto!!! No one can prepare you for motherhood, it's just something you have to go through to understand. And yes, the dramatic stories are one in a million and way more fun to tell. Who likes to hear "My baby napped today!" Boring! People like to hear "My toddler found a butcher knife and chopped up all the ding-dongs and spilled their red punch all over the floor - at GRANDMAS HOUSE!" Way more fun to tell! Any way, even the labor and delivery is an adventure and something to be proud of when it's all said and done. I actually love delivery because it's an end of something horribly uncomfortable (pregnancy) and the beginning of something sublimely wonderful (having your own precious baby!) And just remember, your 1st is the hardest, and as each child brings new challenges, the baby part gets easier, because you've done it before. And NEVER EVER EVER watch the baby story shows until you are done having kids! They even scare me and I've had 4! When you deliver your baby, it will be more like the baby story for Matt than you! :)
I agree that you just have to do it and you'll figure it out as you go. Not that it will be easy sometimes figuring it out, but it's not really something you can totally prepare for. That's what the internet is for, right? Google will know the answers even if your extensive network of mother friends don't. It's totally a big adjustment going from a couple to parents, but you'll do great!
@ Chelsea-- I am glad it all worked out in the end. Thanks for letting me off the hook-- so I don't have to worry about looking crazy or pooping! Ha Ha! That eases my mind.
@ Tiffany-- Thanks for having faith in me! I hope I do okay. Sometimes I think "Hey, I can take care of a baby, I've done it a million times." But sometimes I just think mentally I might lose it, you know? And you can't just give up. Lucky for me Matt will be a great dad like Ben is.
@ Rebecca-- Ha Ha Ha! That butcher knife story made me laugh out loud! So funny-- ahhhh the adventures of motherhood... You know-- I like the way you look at labor and delivery-- I never thought of it that way. I should celebrate it like a birthday-- cause that's what it is really =) The first one must be the hardest. You just don't know what is going on. That is probably why a lot of couples give up after one. But who wants to me an only child? I will continue to stay away from Baby Story. Thanks for the advice!
@Carlee-- YAY for Google! I never thought of it as a parenting guide but you're right-- they have everything on there. I know the adjustment will be huge, I am glad we have your vote of confidence! I have heard of marriages totally falling apart after the first baby. So sad. It is hard to imagine that happening to us but I know you have to be careful with that much change.
Natalie! This is a fun idea. I'm glad you're starting this, however, my main advice when beginning this process is to relax. We can spend our lives stressing over every little detail, but really, we know how to handle naturally (and with the help of the spirit and others around us) far more than we give ourselves credit for. As you go through this process, pay close attention to your thoughts and feelings. It can be an extremely emotional time. When we started trying for a baby and it didn't happen within the first several months, I was devastated. I thought something was horribly wrong with us. It took a little over a year, which looking back isn't so long, but seemed like an eternity and a great trial at the time.
Now that we are where we are and we have found that the baby has a couple of complications that will require surgery when she's born, I know that the Lord has been in the details the whole time. The timing is so much better now for these issues than is would have been, etc... So, relax and trust. So many things can go wrong, but so many things will go RIGHT and the way that they should. Enjoy the journey. It's always good to prepare, just don't stress--you have so many resources available to you to help you.
@Katie-- I know I am too much of a worrier when I should be a warrior-- brave and prepared. I need to find some better ways to relax and de-stress better. I didn't know about your complications. I am so sorry. I am sure that is really hard. Are you figuring it out though? I sure hope it all turns out okay with your little girl!
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